Helen Brand’s 9 Best Quotes

admin2021January 8, 2023

Glass Onion is currently in limbo, as it has just had a record-breaking limited theatrical release and is now waiting for its December 23 Netflix release date. Critics and general audiences have fallen in love with the Knives Out sequel, which follows detective Benoit Blanc solving a murder with a new group of suspects.

One of those suspects is Andi, only it’s revealed midway through the film that she isn’t a suspect at all, but the murder victim. Andi was murdered before the events of the film, and it’s her twin sister, Helen, posing as her and trying to get to the bottom of her murder with Benoit. Helen is bold, blunt, and a total lightweight and that combination leads to some of the funniest one-liners in the series yet.


“Golden Titties!”

Helen Calls Out Miles

Miles looking shocked in Glass Onion A Knives Out Mystery

In the new movie, tech billionaire Miles Bron (Edward Norton) invites a group of his close friends to his private island to play a murder mystery game. And in the early stages of being on the island, it’s clear that there’s some kind of disarray within the group.

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After Miles explains to Benoit the tight-knit group and the respect they have for each other, Helen, acting as Andi, chimes in with the real reason why they’re all so close, and that’s because of Miles’ wealth, or, as she so colorfully puts it, “them golden titties.” It’s also a testament to Norton’s low-key great comedy acting, as he subtly and insecurely covers his nipples after Helen yells the one-liner at him. However, it’s surprising that Helen didn’t blow her cover with the line, as that’s the kind of idiom that Andi would never use.

The Disruptors Are Just S***heads.”

Helen Says It As It Really Is

Miles, Claries, Peg, Whisley, Lionel and Birdie looking at Benoit in Glass Onion

After it’s revealed that Andi is really Helen and is secretly working with Benoit to uncover the truth, she explains the group’s dynamics to Benoit on his lavish apartment terrace in a flashback. She mentions how they call themselves the disrupters, but Andi says it as she sees it, adding, “the disruptors are just s***heads.”

The fact that none of Andi’s closest friends realize that Andi isn’t actually who she says she is, especially as they must know she has a twin sister, is the biggest plot hole in Glass Onion. And Helen using colloquialisms that Andi never would, such as “s***heads,” just adds to that fact. But there’s no denying that Helen’s blunt, to-the-point dialogue is delightful.


Helen After Hot Sauce Runs Down Her Nose

Cassandra looks behind her in Glass Onion

It seems as if s*** and its derivative words are Helen’s go-to curse words. Along with the constant use of “s***heads” as a noun, Helen yells “s***balls!” as an exclamation when hot sauce runs down her nose when he head is tilted backward.

The line is yelled in the movie’s most suspenseful moment, as Helen is playing dead so that nobody will suspect anything, but the hot sauce that she and Benoit used as blood drips down her cheek and into her nostril. However, it isn’t Helen who first uses it, as it was originally said by Benoit just a couple of minutes earlier. Though Benoit never swears and has a sense of innocence about him, “s***balls” is a surprisingly and hilariously fitting curse word for him.

“Yeah, But It’s You Doing It Instead Of Me. I’ll Take Those Odds.”

Helen Putting All The Pressure On Benoit

Detective Blanc talking to Helen in Glass Onion

It sometimes seems like people expect the world of Benoit, and that’s no different when it comes to Helen’s expectations of him. Though Helen means well and wants to get down to the bottom of her sister’s death, she expects a lot of the genius detective. However, when Benoit tells Helen, “I am not Batman. I can find you the truth, I can gather evidence, I can present it to the police and the courts, but that is where my jurisdiction ends,” she responds with the above.

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It’s a great way to put across to the audience Benoit’s role in the movie, as well as showing how much blind faith people have in him. Not only that, but it says a lot about Helen too, as she has no belief in herself even though she turns out to be a great detective in her own right.

“If I Ever Meet Jared Leto, I’m Going To Whoop His Kombucha Brewing A**.”

Helen After Unknowingly Drinking An Alcoholic Beverage

Benoit with Peg and Helen behind him in Glass Onion

Glass Onion is almost flexing when it comes to how many guest appearances there are in the film. The Knives Out sequel is full of celebrity cameos, whether it’s Hugh Grant playing Phillip, Benoit’s domestic partner, or Serena Williams playing herself as Miles’ trainer.

However, while he doesn’t appear in the film, Jared Leto does lend his likeness to the sequel, as his fictional brand of kombucha is the drink of choice on the island. This leads to the running gag that Helen is a better detective when she’s drunk, only she never knew that kombucha was alcoholic. What follows is this hilarious empty threat that would have made for an ingenious mid-credits scene. But as it stands, it’s simply one of Helen’s many great one-liners.

“You Must Be Really Great At Clue, Huh?”

Helen Pointing Out Benoit’s Boardgame-Like Deduction Skills

daniel craig as benoit blanc in glass onion a knives out mystery

When Helen and Benoit are in Greece the night before they board the yacht to Miles’ private island, they go through the gameplan, discussing how they’ll go about deducing who Andi’s murderer is. It comes down to Helen entering tally marks next to other characters’ names in her journal, which is a lot like the classic board game.

However, Benoit replies with a hilarious quote of his own, explaining, “I’m very bad at dumb things. It’s my Achilles’ heel. Ticking boxes, running around, searching all the rooms. It’s just a terrible terrible game.” The detective implies that Clue is for dummies, but it’s his whole career. However, given that he solved Miles’ fake murder before it even happened, Clue might be a little below him.

“You Will Lie For A Lie, But You Won’t Lie For The Truth.”

Helen Embarrasses The Disruptors

Claire argues with Helen in Glass Onion

While Glass Onion is way funnier than its predecessor and is chock full of hilarious one-liners, especially from Helen, the character drops this rather poetic line about her twin sister’s best friends’ morals. Because they will defend Miles even despite knowing that he’s outright lying, Helen tells them all to their faces how out of place their finger-pointing is.


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It might have taken a few bottles of Jared Leto’s kombucha to gain the confidence to say it, but when she did, it was the absolute gut punch that the Disruptors needed. It led to a painfully awkward moment between the group as they knew that each other and themselves were guilty, but it was the line that influenced them to defend Helen in the final act.

“Your Fuel Of The Future Just Barbecued The World’s Most Famous Painting, You Dumbass.”

Helen Burns The Mona Lisa

Edward Norton smirks in Glass Onion

Though he runs a wildly successful company and is worth billions of dollars, there’s absolutely no doubt that Miles is the dumbest Glass Onion character. Between keeping the evidence of murdering Andi and letting Benoit stay on the island, he makes one dumb decision after another, but the dumbest of all might have been renting the Mona Lisa from The Louvre.

In an epic and heroic rampage full of glass-smashing, Helen tells Miles how Klear, the fuel that Miles was guaranteed to make trillions off, led to the Louvre going up in flames. Helen doesn’t stop there, as she continues, “You did get your wish – to forever be remembered in the same breath as the Mona Lisa.”

“Congratulations On The Public Launch Of Klear, And The End Of Miles Bron. You’re ruined.”

Helen Destroy Miles’ Entire Career

Glass Onion Kathryn Hahn

As if pointing out that he was responsible for the destruction of the greatest work of art on Earth wasn’t enough, Helen rubs salt in the wound. Helen tells Miles how his big plan, the plan that led to the murder of Andi and all sorts of other lies and manipulation, is what ruined him.

Though it’s only Miles’ Glass Onion building that has gone up in flames, not his career, it’s implied that the Disruptors have switched sides and are willing to defend Helen. If it wasn’t for all of the badass one-liners and putdowns like these, the disruptors might not have sided with her. And Helen would never have been so bold if she wasn’t so drunk, so when all is said and done, she has Jared Leto to thank.

NEXT: 10 Behind-The-Scenes Facts About Glass Onion

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